Life is Beautiful
by brokenhearts.brokenglass
Summary: A songfic in Matt's point of view. Set to Life is Beautiful by Sixx AM. MxM, read and review. :D


_You can't quit until you try  
You can't live until you die  
You can't learn to tell the truth  
Until you learn to lie _

Did you ever realize what you would possibly be leaving behind when you ever so quickly, ever so silently, stormed out of Wammy's House? Before Roger called you into his office, you told me that you'd be back. But guess what? You never did. You learned to lie a long time ago, Mello, so tell the truth to my face once in awhile!

_You can't breathe until you choke  
You gotta laugh when you're the joke  
There's nothing like a funeral to make you feel alive  
_

When you left, I thought I died inside. The light had one from my eyes and the color left my face. When you left, nobody was here who could earn my trust, and I became the punching bag for many. I was forced to laugh it off, though. I had to look tough, I had to pretend to feel alive.

_Just open your eyes  
Just open your eyes  
And see that life is beautiful.  
Will you swear on your life,  
That no one will cry at my funeral? _

I left just a year later, unable to take anymore of the abuse that my world had become. I stumbled around multiple places, never paying attention to my location, just searching for you. You found me asleep in a park, bruises covering my arms and under my left eye. I opened my eyes later that day to find you sitting across the room. I realized that life was beautiful because I was with you, but I still knew that, if I died, no one would cry at my funeral. As far as I knew, there wouldn't be a funeral; I'd just be thrown into the ground with no one looking.

_I know some things that you don't  
I've done things that you won't  
There's nothing like a trail of blood  
to find your way back home_

You had been living large, running around with a posse that both feared and respected you. Before you found me, I had to endure the real world on my own, being beaten down more than I was rebuilt. I had nobody I could go to, nobody to turn to to help me when I needed it. I've experienced more than you have, and I've learned things that you haven't. The most important thing that I learned? You had to leave a scarred and broken trail tainted with blood to find your way back to your old life.

_I was waiting for my hearse  
What came next was so much worse  
It took a funeral to make me feel alive _

I woke up to the sound of tires squealing across the pavement, and I looked out in time to see a motorcycle turn away. Did I ever suspect it was you? No. I went back to sleep after that, unaware of the lack of your presence. However, once daylight hit, loneliness hit me like a semi-truck. You weren't there, and when I went into the kitchen of our apartment, there was a note. You had to leave with your Mafia buddies, and you said this is our final goodbye. A final goodbye in a letter?! What the hell was wrong with you, Mello?! At that moment, there was nothing but pain throughout my body. I didn't even think morphine, no matter what amount of it, would numb it. I might have already been dead inside, but I decayed to bones if you get what I'm implying.

However, after several long years, I found you again. You were limping through the streets, your face burned and red. I remember that day as if it happened only an hour ago. I clearly remember what your raw, still burning flesh looked like. You complain about your face now... I'm glad you never looked at it before I bandaged it up. I never complained about being your slave, though. I felt alive again, because of your presence.

_Just open your eyes  
Just open your eyes  
And see that life is beautiful.  
Will you swear on your life,  
That no one will cry at my funeral? _

Look at me, Mello, open your eyes! Life is no longer a black abyss filled with loneliness. Can't you see the color in my cheeks, the light in my green eyes? Can't you tell the difference between when you found me the first time and now? I want you to know why I'm happy now with you, and it's because of you, and you only. Open your eyes Mello, and see that life is beautiful when we're together. Open your eyes, and see that I love you and that you are the only thing keeping me alive.


End file.
